


Dust and Ashes

by Riddlebird-puff (hobbitpuff)



Category: Batman (Comics), Batman - All Media Types, Batman: Arkham - All Media Types, Gotham (TV)
Genre: 10 Year Difference, Carrie References, Edward/Oswald Brotp, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Flirting with Southern Insults, High School Reunion, Jonathan/Harleen Brotp, M/M, Middle Aged Jonathan, OC character Jonathan’s Aunt, Southern Jonathan, Wizard of Oz Discussion, past child abuse mentioned
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-06
Updated: 2018-05-06
Packaged: 2019-05-03 05:38:23
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,006
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14562048
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hobbitpuff/pseuds/Riddlebird-puff
Summary: Jonathan requests Edward accompany him back home for his twentieth high school reunion.(Not Gotham-verse Scriddler. But Jonathan is loosely based on Gotham Scarecrow.)





	Dust and Ashes

**Author's Note:**

> First time writing this pairing and very nervous to be posting. Seriously this ship scares me. But hopefully I did it at least a bit of justice.
> 
> Just a few notes:
> 
> Jonathan is older than Edward but Edward is in his late 20s-30s so definitely legal. 
> 
> Also- Jonathan thinks Edward and Penguin have a sexual relationship. They do not as he eventually finds out.
> 
> And lastly, I think I'm the only fan rather fond of the War of Jokes and Riddles Riddler. Not my favorite look but.
> 
> Title from The Great Comet of 1812. Dust and Ashes.

Jonathan stepped through the door held open by one of Ed’s girls. She had given her name as Echo but Jon could not remember if this young lady was the third or fourth that had held that title. The original Echo, he knew, had started her own business with her partner Query.

The Riddler’s hideout was too colorful and much too bright for Jonathan’s sensitivite eyes. Apparently no one had told Ed that hideouts should be dark and unobtrusive. The hideout looked more like an abandoned nightclub, complete with disco balls, which it probably had been knowing Ed.

At least the Riddler’s office was more tastefully done, for the rogue anyway. Although predictably green was featured prominently, in several shades, with gold accents and some purple sprinkled throughout here and there.

Ed looked up from his desk, which he sat on not behind. The rogue wore one of the more casual suits he owned, one of many, with the jacket off. His shirt sleeves were pushed up showing heavily scarred but surprisingly muscular arms. And the shirt was unbuttoned enough to show a hint of the scar on his chest, rumor had it Joker had given him the scar during the long days of their war but Jonathan doubted Joker would have branded the Riddler with his own symbol.

Jonathan thought it was much more likely that the rogue had carved the question mark into his own skin. But he could not figure out why someone as vain as Ed would mar his body in such a way. The Riddler did not even have any piercings or tattoos, that could be seen anyway.

“Professor Crane, what a surprise,” Ed grinned showing a small gap between his front teeth that Jonathan always wondered why he had never had it fixed, though Jon had to admit gave the rogue part of his charm that he was known for. “Have you come to assign me extra curricular activities?”

Jonathan could never be quite sure if Edward was flirting with him or making fun of him. Maybe for the Riddler there wasn’t a difference.

He had been staring he supposed. Ed was a handsome man. But he knew it. And his cockiness made sure everyone else knew it too. Ed was what his foster aunt would have called “stupidly handsome.” And she would have warned him against giving his heart to someone like Nigma.

Good thing the Scarecrow no longer had a heart, if he had ever had one to begin with. But he could admire the rogue, as a scientific observer only of course.

“I come to offer a proposal.” Jonathan crossed his arms.

“The last time we pulled a job together, I ended up getting caught by the Bat and thrown in Arkham.” Ed leaned forward and tapped his finger on his thigh. “I’m listening, convince me.”

Jonathan might have argued that if Ed had stuck to the plan and not gone after the Batman on his own he might have gotten away too.

His eye caught the ring on the Riddler’s finger. It held a large black diamond and was not the rogue’s usual style. Because it was not. It was the mark of Penguin and was only worn by his closest associates. Jonathan had heard the rumors that Edward was much more to the Penguin than merely an associate. Rumors Jonathan had been so far unable to prove or disprove.

“It has recently come to my notice that my high school twenty year reunion is next weekend.” Jonathan was never one to waste words. “My proposal is, I ask that you accompany me back home. As my significant other.”

He had caught Ed by surprise he noted with some satisfaction. It was not everyday one could take the Riddler by surprise.

“I had not realized our relationship was quite at the level of bringing each other back home.” Ed’s smile was back. “In fact I was not even aware our relationship had moved past my futile attempts to charm you into my bed. Is there something you’ve been keeping from me, Dr. Crane?”

“You would of course be well compensated for it.”

It was true that Ed had often invited Jonathan to his bed but he did that with most everyone. And as far as he could tell, he was one of only a few rogues that had never taken him up on the offer.

“I may be known to take any job that pays well, and I know you disapprove of my promiscuous ways, but that is something even I have never taken payment for.” Ed pushed himself off the table and turned his back on Jon. “I must ask you to leave.”

“Don’t be ridiculous, Nigma.” Jonathan blushed at his social inaccuracies. “There will be no sexual expectations. We will be staying with my aunt, an elderly Baptist woman who does not believe in sharing a bed before marriage. We will likely not even be in the same room, much less bed.”

“Aunt?” Ed turned around and crossed his arms. “I didn’t even know you had family, Scarecrow.”

“What? Did you think I was stuffed with straw and birthed in a cornfield?”

Ed chuckled. “And you what, want me to go to Kansas with you in search of your heart?”

“You’re thinking of the Tin Man, the Scarecrow wanted a brain. And I’m not from Kansas. It’s Georgia.”

“Same difference.” Ed shrugged. “Why me?”

“The kids I went to high school with made those years a living hell. I’m thinking revenge is better served late than never. And you are the only rogue I trust for this job. I know you will not try to change my mind or stop me.”

“You want my help to dump pig blood on your old classmates?”

“Did that for prom.” Jon smiled. “I was thinking my fear gas and your exhibitor mist always did pair quite nicely.”

Ed whistled. “You must really hate them. A job like this, outside of Gotham jurisdiction, is more dangerous than I care for. If I agree to do this, I want the formula to the hallucinative agent in your gas.”

“That price is too high.” Jonathan crossed his arms. “I will trade you a single vial of the concentrated formula for your study.”

He should have guessed Nigma’s price. The Riddler had been trying to get the formula out of him for years. No doubt the rogue would put the formula to no good use. It really wasn’t any of Jonathan’s business but he couldn’t just give it to Riddler for free.

“Twelve vials.”

“Six. Take it or leave it.” Jonathan turned away. “I can always ask Harleen for assistance, she has a heavier hand true but her price will be more reasonable.”

“Wait.” Ed called out. “I agree to the terms.”

Jon shook Nigma’s outstretched hand. Neither men wore gloves and the touch of skin on Jonathan’s hand made his flesh tingle. The other rogues assumed he was touch repulsed but that wasn’t exactly the truth. He was touch sensitive. There was a distinctive difference.

The Riddler was known to be very tactical. And Jonathan had just agreed to spend the whole weekend in his company. He wasn’t sure if he could survive the trip without killing the man.

“I would’ve agreed to do it for free.” Ed grinned. “I wouldn’t pass up the chance to see where baby Jonathan Crane came from. Naked baby and awkward teenager pictures would’ve been payment enough.”

Jonathan did not tell him he would be disappointed.

“I will pick you up Friday morning, at eight.”

It would give them time to arrive at Aunt Polly’s home sometime Friday night. The reunion was Saturday night. And they could leave that morning and be back in Gotham before Monday morning.

“We’re taking the ‘fearmobile’?” Ed giggled. “You’ve never been one to be subtle, Crane. I’ll give you that.”

“Bring whatever you’ll need for the reunion. But dress appropriately to meet my Aunt Polly. I don’t want her to suspect anything of our real purpose.”

“I will play nothing but the besotted boyfriend for Aunt Polly’s benefit.” Ed kissed Jonathan’s hand. “And believe me I can be very convincing.”

Jonathan wiped his hand on his leg. “Be ready to leave when I get here. I want to keep to schedule.”

He turned around and left without saying goodbye.

 

* * *

 

“What’s this?” Edward grabbed a wrapped cookie from the shelf and tore it open. He took a bite. “Ugggh. Gross. Too sweet!” He threw more moon pies in the handheld cart. “We need to bring some back to the others. Harley will love them.”

Jonathan looked in the cart full of junk food and sighed. He had been driving for ten hours straight while Edward sat next to him and attempted to get him to play road games. And the lights of the convenience store were too bright. He rubbed at his eyes. He was getting a migraine and he wanted nothing more at that moment than to fall asleep in his old bed.

“We should get there in a couple of more hours.” Jonathan took the basket from Ed and walked to the front of the store. “My aunt will have dinner ready for us when we arrive.”

Jonathan put the basket on the counter for the clerk. The clerk was an older lady of unknown years.

It was strange to be so close to home after so many years. Gotham seemed far away and like something he had dreamed. Jonathan was almost glad to have Ed with him to remind him it was real.

Edward slipped behind him and grabbed his ass. “I just noticed how nice your ass looks in jeans, Crane. You should wear them more often.” Ed kissed his ear.

“Aren’t you two are sweet?” The clerk giggled. “How long have you been together?”

“Two years,” Jonathan answered. It seemed a low enough number to be safe but high enough to be believable.

“Nine years.” Edward answered at the same time. “We’ve known each other for nine. Actually dating for two.” He laughed. “I’m meeting the family. A little nervous I guess.”

The clerk laughed and Jonathan felt as though they were both laughing at him somehow.

“I like both of you. And I have nothing against folks like yourself. But I should warn you. Not everyone here will be as open minded. You might want to be careful with showing too much affection in public.” The clerk smiled like she was doing them a favor.

“Thank you kindly, ma’am.” Jonathan took the bag from her and turned towards Ed. “Come on, darlin.” He quickly pecked Ed’s mouth. He grabbed Ed around the waist and left the store.

Jonathan dropped his arm as soon as they got to his custom hearse. He slammed the driver door as Ed got in on the other side.

“What was that all about?” Edward chuckled. “Not that I’m complaining.”

“If there is one thing I hate more than southern hospitality, it is southern hypocrisy.” Jonathan pulled out of the lot. “That was a nice save by the way. But I guess we need to get our story straight.”

“Did you tell your Aunt Polly how we met?”

“I told her you were a former student.” Jonathan tapped nervously on the steering wheel. “Though we only started dating a few years ago.”

“No doubt I tried to seduce you into giving me an A.”

“You were a below average student with a smart mouth that often got you into trouble.” Jonathan smiled slightly. “A troubled youth with authority issues.”

“I bet I had a crush on you.” Ed giggled. “I’ve seen Harley’s old pictures from your university days. And you definitely had that professor nerd chic look going for you. I’m guessing you had a lot of students throwing themselves at you, boys and girls.”

Jonathan wondered what Harleen had told him. But he had made a promise to her never to speak of it and that was a promise he had kept.

“Nothing inappropriate ever happened with any of my students, Nigma.” Jonathan’s hands tightened around the steering wheel. He may never have been a nice teacher but he always prided himself on being a good one. “Which brings us to the next point, we need to set physical boundaries.”

“I might remind you, you’re the one that kissed me, Crane.” Edward took another bite of moon pie.

“I should not have done that.” Jonathan tapped the steering wheel. “It will not occur again. And I must insist you keep any touches above the waist.”

“Does that mean I am allowed to touch you anywhere I wish as long as it’s above the waist?” Ed wiggled his fingers.

Jonathan felt as though he had fallen into one of the Riddler’s traps.

“Not anywhere on the face.” Jonathan shifted. “And if we must kiss for appearances not on the mouth.”

Ed nodded. “What about hand touching and holding?”

“Hand touching is fine, as long as it is kept brief. Hand holding is a no unless one or both of us are wearing gloves.”

“How about hugs?”

“Hugging is acceptable if kept to a minimum. And with one arm only.”

Jonathan was thankful Edward seemed to be taking his requests seriously.

“What about nicknames and pet names? I can hardly call you Crane if we’re trying to sell being lovers to your aunt. Can I call you Jonny?”

Jonathan grimaced. “You can call me Jon or Jonathan.”

“You can call me Eddie. Or you can call me darlin again, if you like.” Edward giggled. “I reckon I rather liked the sound of it.” The rogue tried out the accent.

“I will call you Edward.” Jonathan should have known Ed would not let that go without comment.

“By the Bat! You even said my name with an accent.” Edward laughed. “I swear you don’t have an accent back in Gotham. Next you’ll be sarcastically telling me to bless my poor heart.”

Jonathan had not lived in the South in almost twenty years, and he had lost the accent within the first semester of Gotham University, but every time he returned it was as though he had never left.

“You’re so full of shit your eyes are brown, Edward.” His eyes were actually the color of the clearest topaz but Ed didn’t need to know that.

Edward threw his head back and laughed. “Anyone who says Shakespeare knew the best insults clearly never spent any time in the South. New rule when we get back to Gotham, the Scarecrow can only use southern insults in battle.”

“Prepare to have your corn creamed.” Jonathan smiled.

“Bats! Is that supposed to be a threat or a pick up line?”

“You better give your heart to Jesus, ‘cause your ass is mine.”

He was happy to see Edward choke. “That’s the one! That’s the line you used to get me in your bed.”

Jonathan actually laughed. “Well butter my butt and call me a biscuit.”

“I would pay you to use that line on Joker just to see the look on his face.” Edward giggled. “But now you’ve gone and reminded me how hungry I am.”

“In a few short hours you will experience your first southern supper, you’ll be as full as a tick on a stuffed pig.”

“Ugh. That’s a disgusting image.” Ed shivered. “Aren’t you hungry? We haven’t eaten in hours.”

Jonathan shrugged. “I ate toast before we left.”

“That was more than ten hours ago! You do know you’re not really made of straw, right Crane?” Ed broke the moon pie in half and brought it up to Jonathan’s mouth. “No road trip is complete without sampling a local snack.”

Jonathan rolled his eyes but took a bite of the offered morsel from Edward’s hand. And immediately wished he had not.

He swallowed the goopy paste and wished he had picked up a cup of coffee back at the store to wash the taste down.

“I’m bored.” Ed stated. “Entertain me. Tell me more of your southern sayings. I want to speak like a native by the time we arrive at your aunt’s.”

“You couldn’t find your ass with both hands in your back pockets.”

Ed chuckled. “You southerners have an obsession with asses. Or is it only you who are obsessed with mine, Jonathan?” He wiggled his eyebrows.

“Don’t blame me if yer pants are so tight I can see yer religion.”

Ed was so quiet Jonathan looked over at him, he had not meant to go so far as to insult his companion. They were stuck with each other the whole weekend after all. But the rogue slowly grinned.

“You are definitely coming with me and Selina next time we prowl the clubs for free drinks.” Ed grinned. “It’s always a contest to see who can get the most. Thrown drinks are subtracted from the total. And the one with the highest number at the end of the night wins.”

Jonathan blushed. He had no desire to flirt with strangers in a club. He had been almost enjoying himself. But there was only one person he wanted to flirt with.

“As much as I might enjoy watching you get drinks thrown at you, I am afraid I must decline the offer.” Jonathan paused. “If you’re still bored put on the radio.”

He had to remind himself that the Riddler was only there for the job. And no other reason.

 

* * *

 

“Do you think she’ll like me?” Edward followed Jonathan up the drive.

“What does it matter, Edward? In case you have forgotten we are not in fact actually dating.”

“But your aunt will believe we are. I want her to like me.”

Jonathan sighed. “Why must everyone always like you?”

“My whole existence is reliant on constant validation from others, you know that Jon.”

“You will work your charm on Aunt Polly like you always do.” Jonathan stepped on the porch. “And she will fall for it the same as everyone else.”

“You never did, Crane.”

“And the fact that you believe I don’t like you, that anyone doesn’t like you, bothers you, doesn’t it?”

“I know you find me irritating, Jonathan.”

“My dear, Edward. I find everyone irritating.”

Jonathan opened the screen door and stepped into the house. He held it open for Edward.

Ed whistled. “We are definitely not in Gotham.”

“Aunt Polly knew we were coming.” Jonathan shrugged. “Aunt Polly, we’re here.” He called out louder.

“Jonnyboy!” Polly yelled from the kitchen and met them in the small dining area. She hugged Jonathan. “Look at you.” She pulled back and looked up at him. “I swear you get taller every time I see you. You certainly don’t get your height from my side of the family.”

Jonathan sighed. It was an old joke. “I have not grown in twenty years, Aunt Polly.”

“I must have forgotten how tall you are then, you never visit.” Polly turned towards Edward. “Though with this handsome young man to keep you company I can hardly blame you for not wanting to visit an old woman.”

“Aunt Polly may I introduce you to Edward Nashton.” They had both decided to use one of Ed’s aliases on the way. “Edward this is my Aunt Polly.”

Jonathan got his first good look at his aunt. Aunt Polly had always seemed ageless to him but it appeared age had finally caught up to the old woman. And the skin on her face was the color and texture of ancient bark.

“My pleasure.” Edward kissed the back of her hand. “Jonathan has often told me much about you.”

“Then you are either a pretty liar, or you have not known my Jonnyboy very long.” Polly smacked the back of his hand. “The truth now, you didn’t even know he had an auntie until he invited you to come along, is that right?”

Ed held his hand. “I like her. I can see the resemblance.” He paused awkwardly. “I mean… that is…” Edward looked uncomfortably between them.

He should have known it would not take Edward long to address the dead possum in the living room.

Jonathan knew that the physical differences between himself and the older woman were almost comical. He was light where she was dark. Tall where she was short. And skinny where she was fat. But the truth was he had always felt more akin to this woman who did not share his blood than the father whom he saw every time he looked in a mirror.

“Guess we couldn’ta fool ya. Jonny here is me own boy. Was his daddy’s maid I was. Until I got in the family way that is.”

Aunt Polly cackled at Edward’s expression.

“Aunt Polly is my foster aunt, Edward.” Jonathan finally explained. “She took me in after my father was killed.”

“The only use that man found in this life was to feed the crows that fed off his corpse. And even then he probably poisoned the poor birds.”

Jonathan cleared his throat. “Edward has been looking forward to his first taste of real southern hospitality the whole way here.”

“I managed put together a little something on such short notice.” Aunt Polly shook her finger at Jonathan. “I hope there’s enough.”

“I wouldn’t want to be a bother…” Edward began.

“That would be a first.” Jonathan said under his breath.

“What kind of host would I be if I couldn’t feed my guests?” Aunt Polly snapped the dishcloth in her hand at Jonathan. “Make yourselves useful and set the table while I heat everything.”

Edward followed Jonathan to the kitchen and gave a low whistle at seeing all the food. There was so much fried chicken Aunt Polly may have butchered an entire flock. Corn still on the cob. A pan of cornbread. And butter on every surface. There was even a peach pie.

“How many people will be at dinner?” Edward asked.

“Only us.” Jonathan chuckled. He handed the plates to Edward.

 

* * *

 

“I made a bed for the both of you in your old room, Jonny.” Aunt Polly started clearing the table. “I’m sure you’re both tuckered out after the long drive.”

“Edward can take my old room.” Jonathan stood. “I will make the bed in the spare room for myself.”

He had been looking forward to sleeping in his old bed but he had been raised right.

“I am seventy-six Jonathan.” Aunt Polly chuckled. “You don’t have to pretend you’ve never shared a bed with your fella.”

Edward hid his laugh behind a cough.

“We wouldn’t want to disrespect your household.” Jonathan tried.

“You could never disrespect this household, Jonny.” Aunt Polly pulled Jonathan down and kissed his cheeks. “This household is as much yours as it is mine.”

Jonathan sighed in defeat. “And you gave me the only place I could ever call home.”

Gotham might be where his home was now but it would never be home.

“Just remember this is an old drafty house and the walls are paper thin.” She winked at Edward. “And I have a feeling your man ain’t often the silent type.”

“Aunt Polly!” Jonathan rubbed his eyes. His headache was pounding now.

“Don’t worry.” Edward wrapped his arm around Jonathan. “Jonboy here knows just how to keep me quiet.”

“Edward. Please.”

Aunt Polly chuckled. “I took down some of your things and put the boxes in your old bedroom. Thought you might enjoy going through some of your things you left behind.”

“Here allow me to help.” Edward started piling the dirty plates on top of another. There were many more than just what three people seemed to need.

“I’ll go get the bags out of the car, darlin.” Jonathan pecked Edward’s cheek in revenge.

 

* * *

 

Jonathan’s phone vibrated while he was in the back of the custom hearse.

Miss Quinzel: How’s the Fake Dating AU going?  
Miss Quinzel: Any smooches yet??  
Miss Quinzel: Do you gotta share a bed?  
Miss Quinzel: Please say there’s only one bed!!  
Miss Quinzel: Eddie’s great at cuddles.  
Miss Quinzel: It’s his arms.  
Miss Quinzel: You better not be answering the phone because your arms are otherwise busy, Prof.  
Miss Quinzel: ;) ;) ;) ;) ;)

The phone buzzed as he was reading the texts.

Miss Quinzel: If you don’t text me back in ten minutes I’m calling Pengy.

Jonathan started to type slowly with one finger.

Professor Spooky: I am here.

Miss Quinzel: And…. ?  
Miss Quinzel: Give me something. I’m dying here.

Professor Spooky: Fine.  
Professor Spooky: Yes. Kisses. Two.

Miss Quinzel: Tongue?

Professor Spooky: No!! Of course not!  
Professor Spooky: Bed. Yes. Sharing.  
Professor Spooky: Cuddles. I hope not.  
Professor Spooky: Arms. Ahem. Nice.  
Professor Spooky: Yes.  
Professor Spooky: With luggage.

Miss Quinzel: Buzzkiller.  
Miss Quinzel: Have a little fun for once Prof ;)  
Miss Quinzel: I expect details!  
Miss Quinzel: Call me in the morning!  
Miss Quinzel: <3

Professor Spooky: Good night, Miss Quinzel.

Jonathan slipped the phone back in his pocket.

He was fond of Harleen Quinzel. He might’ve even called the young woman a friend if he could call anyone a friend. And she was the only person who knew of his unnecessary feelings for Riddler.

Crush. Might as call it what it was. He’d had crushes before. But he had also been much younger and they had burned themselves out quickly. This thing with Nigma had lasted more than six years. And though the flame had settled to a steady glow it had never completely gone out.

And now he had somehow agreed to sleep in the same bed.

He should have never allowed Miss. Quinzel to talk him into hiring Nigma for this job.

 

* * *

 

Jonathan opened the door to his old bedroom.

“No… it’s not like that, Ozzie. I gotta go Pengy. He’s back. I know. You too.” He closed the phone.

Edward was laying on the bed. His back against the headboard and his ankles crossed. And his shirt was unbuttoned completely.

“So, you and Cobblepot, huh? Do I have to worry about one of Penguin’s goons setting fire to my straw when we get back to Gotham?”

“I feed off passion but am always starving. I am ever seeking but never finding. What am I?” The Riddler placed his arms behind his head. And his shirt fell open.

Jonathan tried not to stare. When had the Riddler become allergic to shirts anyway?

“I am not jealous, Riddler.” Jonathan crossed his arms. “I would be more worried about the jealousy of Penguin if I were you.”

Jonathan was afraid the Scarecrow would have to pay a visit to the Iceberg Lounge when they returned.

“Cobblepot has no reason to be jealous.” Edward smirked. “He does not concern himself with my affairs. And I do not concern myself with his.”

Nigma and Cobblepot must have a beneficially open relationship, Jonathan mused. It made sense, he supposed. However it was not something he wished to get involved in. As tempting as it may be.

Jonathan would be sure to make the Penguin a gift of his preferred darts for his trick umbrella as a peace offering.

He walked to his old desk and searched through the box of his things that Aunt Polly had left for him. Not surprisingly the contents consisted mostly of worn books.

Jonathan heard the bed squeak as Edward got off it and joined him. The man stood so near that Jonathan could almost imagine he felt breath on his neck. Jonathan did not move. He felt trapped.

Edward had always had a problem with personal space.

“Carrie.” Edward picked up the first book. “Is this dried blood?” He picked at a mystery stain on the corner cover. “Somehow I don’t think you were joking about the pig’s blood at prom comment.”

Jonathan took the book from Edward’s hands. The stain was more than likely ketchup. Or just plain dirt.

“I worked part time at a butcher shop in high school.” Jonathan shrugged. “It was a mixture of pig and cow blood. And it was homecoming not prom.”

It had been the Scarecrow’s first work. And perhaps it had not been his finest moment. But it had been worth getting suspended for.

“Alice in Wonderland. Through the Looking Glass. Peter Pan. Wizard of Oz.” Edward placed each book in a pile but kept the last in his hands. “I would’ve expected more Lovecraft and less children’s books, Crane.”

“Lovecraft was an overrated hack. If you had ever read any children’s book you would know they are more horror than anything from Lovecraft or even King.” Jonathan took out the last book of the stack. Something Wicked This Way Comes. “And Bradbury was the master of both.”

Edward flipped through the book in his hands. “Let me guess, your favorite character was Scarecrow.”

“Sorry to disappoint you. But no.”

“You know, Scarecrow was my first crush. But my favorite was Tin Man. Always thought the two of them should’ve hooked up.” Edward winked.

“If you know someone’s favorite Wizard of Oz character you know what they would wish from the wizard.” Jonathan was surprised that Edward answer rated heart above brain, love above mind.

“What if their favorite character is Oz?”

“They would wish for fame.”

“And the Wicked Witch?”

“Power.”

“Glinda?”

“Goodness.” Jonathan shrugged. “Or perhaps, they would only wish for the good witch’s wardrobe.”

“What if they said Toto?”

“Then they would be the most contented person on Earth.” Jonathan laughed. “Or they just really love dogs.”

“And Dorothy is of course home and family.” Edward replied. “I always thought Dorothy’s wish was foolish. If it been me I would have burned the ruby slippers and stayed in Oz forever.”

Jonathan knew something of Edward’s abusive childhood after the Riddler had accidentally gotten sprayed with fear gas on a heist. But it was something they had never spoken about.

Jonathan had not wanted Edward to pry into his own past.

“You’re forgetting one. The Cowardly Lion.”

“Didn’t forget. The Cowardly Lion was the least useful character. He was weak and worthless. And he did nothing but get his friends into trouble. They would’ve been better off without him.”

Jonathan knew Edward was speaking of himself more than him. But his words still made him feel like the boy in the dark basement.

“The Cowardly Lion is meant to teach children that it is okay to be scared. That true bravery is not the lack of fear but being able to be brave in the face of it.”

“The Cowardly Lion is just comic relief. He’s only there for children to laugh at.” Edward handed the book to Jonathan. “Anyway, wouldn’t have pegged you as a furry, Dr. Jonathan Crane.”

“We do live in Gotham, Nigma.” Jonathan shrugged. “Some days Arkham resembles a convention of furries more than an asylum.”

Edward laughed. “I’m surprised you even know what a furry is, Crane.”

“I was a psychologist. Nothing surprises me.”

“You intrigue me, Crane.” Edward bit his lip. “You know what they say about the quiet ones.”

“And you know what they say about the loud ones.” Jonathan grinned. “All they know how to do is blow.”

“If your aunt wasn’t in the next room, I would take you up on that challenge to prove how wrong you are.”

“No doubt. Everyone in Gotham knows the Riddler sucks as well as he blows.”

“That was bad, really bad, Crane.” Edward giggled. “That’s why I like you so much. No one makes me laugh quite as much as you. Who knew a scarecrow could be funnier than a clown and a harlequin.”

Jonathan shushed Edward. “Not so loud. I don’t want Aunt Polly to become suspicious.”

“What does she think you do in Gotham anyway?” Edward dug through the box.

“Teach at Gotham High.”

“You miss it don’t you, Professor Crane?” Edward pulled out a thin stack of photos out a school book.

“The last time I taught a class of students I fired a loaded gun at the prized quarterback. I may miss teaching but I do not miss the students, Nigma.”

That wasn’t the truth, though, was it. Jonathan did miss teaching. There were days he even missed his students. Some of them anyway.

“Harley told me about what happened. From what I understand the boy deserved it.” Edward looked down at the top photo. “Harley considers you her hero, you know.”

Jonathan looked at the photo in Edward’s hands. It was upside down for him but he knew it.

“Dr. Gerald Crane. My father.”

Edward shrugged. “At least we know what you’ll look like when you get old.”

“I am old, Nigma.”

It was difficult to fathom that he was only twelve years younger than his father had been when Jonathan killed him.

“Old-er then. We’re all getting older, Crane.” Edward shrugged. “Just the other night I got a leg cramp running from the Bat. Luckily he became occupied by a certain clown long enough for me to get away.”

“That isn’t age, Nigma.” Jonathan said. “You’ve always been about as puffed up as a banty rooster.”

“Did you just compare me to a small fighting rooster?” Edward asked. “Don’t tell Ozzie, I’ll never hear the end of it.”

Scarecrow and Penguin did not always eye to eye but one thing Jonathan and Oswald did share was a love for birds. Cobblepot even had a sanctuary of rescued fighting roosters.

It was while dropping off an especially feisty banty rooster that Jonathan had first made the comparison to Riddler. Oswald had choked on his cigar. And immediately named the bird Eddie.

“Is this you?” Edward held up a photo taken of a teenage boy with long hair and baggy clothes. “How old were you when this was taken?”

“It is. I would have been seventeen or eighteen.”

“Would it be slightly jailbait if I said you were cute?”

“Considering you were not even ten when it was taken I think we can make an allowance.”

Edward pulled out the next picture and whistled. “This must have been the infamous university days. You clean up nice. You should wear your hair back more often. You have cheekbones the Sirens would kill you for, Crane.”

“You can find the same bone structure on any corpse in the city morgue.”

Jonathan closed his eyes. He still had panic attacks of that day. He could still see the corpse “borrowed” from the medical lab wearing his jacket that had gone missing the week before sitting at his desk like some morbid scarecrow.

It had been ruled an harmless prank after he had refused to give the star quarterback a passing grade.

However that had not been the reason he had shot at the boy.

Edward placed the photos back in the front of the book and flipped to the back cover where he discovered a clipping from a newspaper. He unfolded the page and read the title.

“Doctor Fear’s House of Horrors.” Edward read. “Son kept in basement.” The photo was blurry but clearly him. He folded the article back up and held it out to Jonathan.

“You may as well finish the article, Nigma.” He did not take the paper. “Everyone at the reunion will know the story. Someone will be bound to mention it. No doubt to warn ya.”

“I would rather hear it from you.” Edward handed the folded page to Jonathan.

“And I’ll tell you.” Jonathan placed the article back in the book. Aunt Polly would not have known it was there or she would not have put the book in the box. “Tomorrow. We should get some sleep while we can.”

“I knew you would eventually invite me into your bed, Crane.” Edward took his shirt off and started to unbutton his trousers.

“What- are you doing?” Jonathan spluttered.

“What does it look like? You don’t expect me to sleep in my clothes, do you?” Edward stripped to his briefs. Very tight green briefs.

Jonathan did not mean to look. But it was difficult not to. He could not tell what was more torture, the expanse of bared flesh or what little the cloth badly concealed.

Edward chuckled. And Jonathan snapped out of it.

“I figured you’d bring something to sleep in, Nigma.”

Edward looked too amused to Jonathan. “I did. I usually sleep in the nude. But if you would rather-.” He begun to pull down the briefs.

“If you get in that bed naked you can expect me to wear my gauntlets to bed.”

“I always knew you’d be kinky, Crane.” Edward winked.

Jonathan pulled the pajamas he had brought on the trip out of the bag. And quickly changed trying to ignore Edward who of course did not have the decency to look away.

When he turned back around he saw Edward was already in bed under the covers.

“I know the bed is not large but I expect you will stick to your side.” Jonathan waited for Edward to slide over before getting in.

Jonathan knew he could easily sleep on the floor. It would not be comfortable. But he had slept in worst conditions. However his pride would not allow him to back away from the challenge.

And possibly there was a small part of him that he didn’t want to acknowledge that wanted to get into bed with the scantily dressed rogue.

Jonathan was an adult, he was an old man, he could do this.

He got into the bed and turned his back to the other man. He turned off the light.

“Jonathan, why did you ask me to come with you?”

Who else would he have asked, he wondered.

“I guess I find you less irritating than most, Edward.” Edward laughed.

Jonathan shut his eyes.

 

* * *

 

Jonathan was the first to wake. And he was embarrassed to find that he had somehow ended up cuddling Edward in the night. He would have liked to have blamed Nigma but he had to admit the evidence proved his innocence.

He got up without waking him and went to the bathroom.

It was not the first time he had shared a bed with another man. But it was hardly what anyone would consider a common occurrence. And he could not remember the last time he had woken in bed with someone.

It must have been Tetch he supposed. And that was more than ten years ago.

Waking next to, or on, Edward had not been unpleasant.

Jonathan entered the kitchen where Aunt Polly was already starting breakfast.

“I figured you’d be sleeping in.” She teased.

“I’ll do that.” Jonathan grabbed the mixing bowl from her and added the remaining ingredients.

“I like him, Jonny. He’s good for you.” Aunt Polly poked his chest. “Don’t scare this one off.”

“Eddie doesn’t scare easily.”

“Eddie, huh?” She laughed. “You love him, don’t you?”

“I like him.” Jonathan did not believe in love.

“How long have ye liked the boy then?”

“Edward is not a boy, Aunt Polly.” Jonathan spooned the pancake mixture on the griddle. “And we told you, we’ve been together for two years.”

“Didn’t ask how long you’ve been together. Asked how long you’ve liked him.”

Jonathan sighed. “I don’t know what you mean.”

“I’ve seen the way you look at him, Jonny. You can’t fool me. I’ll ask again, how long have you liked this boy?”

“Six. Six years.” Six years too long. Jonathan did not even know how it had happened.

Edward came in yawning. At least he had put trousers on before coming out. But he had taken one of Jonathan’s flannel shirts.

Jonathan had an image of Edward in his bed spread out before him in nothing but the open flannel shirt and green briefs.

He turned back to the burning pancakes.

Edward wrapped his arms around Jonathan’s chest and lay his head on his shoulder. “Woke up and you were gone.” He yawned. “I’m never up this early.”

“I’ve seen you pull all nighters before, Eddie.”

“Not the same. Are you making pancakes?” Edward grabbed one from the plate and folding it plopped it whole into his mouth. “Mmm. If you make me breakfast every morning I just might have to stay over more.” He gave his cheek a peck.

“I’ll leave you two love birds alone.” Aunt Polly chuckled and left.

Edward hopped on top of the counter. “I don’t suppose I can’t talk you into coming back to bed.”

“Thought we could take a road trip before the reunion. I did promise to tell you a story.”

“You don’t have to do that, Crane.”

Jonathan shrugged. “I’ve got unfinished business there. It’s time to burn the past.”

“Why do I get the feeling you don’t mean that figuratively?” Edward grinned.

“I’ve never been one for metaphorically symbolism.”

“No. Of course not. Because there’s nothing symbolic about a man dressed as a scarecrow setting fire to his childhood home.” Edward chuckled.

Maybe Nigma had a point. “We leave after breakfast.”

 

* * *

 

Jonathan pulled the burlap sack over his head, grabbed the gasoline tank, and led the Riddler up the broken drive towards the old fashioned farm house.

The burlap was itchy on his face. But it was good to have it on again.

It was the first time he had seen the old homestead with the eyes of the Scarecrow. It looked smaller than he remembered.

“So this is the birthplace of the Scarecrow. It has aesthetic. I’ll grant you that.”

The Riddler placed his hat on his head and gave the cane in his hand a twirl. The other rogue had no other weapon on his body. But one was not needed. The simple cane held one or two shocks of surprise.

The rogue was dressed somewhat casually. Dark green slacks and a white dress shirt that was actually buttoned for once. If they were seen his companion would not draw much suspicion.

Not like the Scarecrow.

“Dr. Gerald Crane moved here from Gotham after losing his job at Arkham Asylum. He bought this place and opened his practice. He married a good local girl. They had a little boy and a baby girl on the way. Dr. Crane, Arkham’s so-called “Doctor of Fear”, seemed nothing more than a good ole country doctor. But then his wife died along with their unborn daughter.”

The Scarecrow’s voice was deeper than Jonathan’s, muffled by mask.

“How did she die?”

Scarecrow pulled open the broken screen and entered the house.

“It was fire.” Scarecrow answered. “It started in the nursery. Dr. Crane was away on a house call. And the boy hid in the basement. The fire was stopped before it spread but not before Mrs. Crane died from the smoke.”

The fire damage could still be seen on the staircase.

“At first Dr. Crane blamed himself. But after awhile he questioned why the boy had lived. And began to blame the boy instead. Perhaps if the boy had not hid in fear, his wife and his unborn girl would still be alive.”

“How old were y- how old was the boy?”

“Twelve. He was twelve when his mother died.” Scarecrow led down the steps to the basement. “We were fourteen when he locked us down here for good.”

He shut the door behind and lit the lamp he had brought with them.

Scarecrow could sense the Riddler’s fear. But the taste of it was bitter with the rogue’s pity.

“Surely the town must have noticed when the boy went missing.”

“The boy’s mind had broken with his mother’s death. And the father retired from medical practice to take care of the boy. Such devotion to the only family left to him, they said. The boy was always an odd one, they whispered. Perhaps he had grown jealous of the new baby and, but no they must not even say it.”

Scarecrow placed the lamp on a ledge.

He could feel Jonathan’s fear here in this dark hole but this hole held no fear for the Scarecrow.

“You wished to see the birthplace of the Scarecrow. This is the hole in which I was born.”

Riddler faced Scarecrow. “My father beat my mother and me. And I hated that I could not protect her. One day he hit her and I fought back. And fought back. I broke his nose and he needed stitches to hold his lip in place. I thought my mother would thank me. She tossed me out of the house. I was fifteen.”

“If you’re looking for pity there is none to offer in this place.”

Jonathan stirred.

“I can bring tears to your eyes, make you smile, or make you shake in fear. I can reverse time and make it stand still. A baby has no need of me but an old man takes me to his grave. What am I?”

“An easy one. You would be a memory.”

Riddler stepped closer. “I would be. And I would give you a more pleasant memory to carry of this place if you would allow. Before we destroy it.”

“We are hardly horny teenagers on a dare to fuck in the House of Fear.” Scarecrow pointed to the dirty mattress that had been moved in after his time. “Want to put your own mark on the wall, do ya? Figure being fucked by the god of fear is worth at least ten marks.”

“God of fear? Really, Jonathan? You are nothing but a scared little boy wearing a sack on his head.” Edward laughed.

“What do you want, Eddie?” Scarecrow growled in Riddler’s face.

Jonathan was suddenly very thankful he had left his gauntlets back in the car.

“What I want can be given and received but it is worthless when stolen. It can be a hello or a goodbye. It speaks without words. It is useless to one but priceless to two. What is it?”

Edward’s fear was stronger than his pity now and it smelled delicious to the Scarecrow.

“No games, Nigma.” Scarecrow held his blunt nail against Edward’s bared throat. “What do you want?”

“A kiss.” Edward held out his arms. “Just that.”

“What would make you think I, Scarecrow, would wish to kiss you?”

“Not you. Him. Jonathan.” Edward grinned.

“Edward.”

Edward gripped the bottom of his mask. He pulled the mask off slowly giving Jonathan time to stop him. Edward dropped it to the ground.

“Say the word, Jon. I will not steal this from you.” He spoke in Jonathan’s ear.

Jonathan opened his eyes to Edward. He was no longer afraid and that scared him.

“If you’re gonna kiss me than stop yammering ‘bout it and just do it.”

Edward held Jonathan’s head in place and kissed him. Jonathan found him surprisingly gentle. Too gentle. He needed to feel more.

Jonathan backed Edward against the wall and kissed him harder. He bit and pulled hard on his bottom lip. And Ed swiped his tongue along Jon’s top. Jonathan licked the side of his tongue. Edward moaned and stroke the underside of Jonathan’s tongue with his own.

He grabbed Edward’s wrists and held his arms above his head. Ed’s groin bucked against his front but he made no move to free himself.

Ed licked the roof Jon’s mouth. Jonathan bit down gently on his tongue and pulled away scraping his teeth along the sensitive muscle.

Edward was flushed and was breathing as hard as he was. And that wasn’t the only thing that was hard, Jonathan felt against his leg.

“Bats, Crane.” Edward grinned. “Do that again and we won’t need my cane to spark the fire.”

“Shoulda bit your tongue off when I had the chance.” Jonathan wiped his mouth on his sleeve. “But guess I should thank ye for bringing me back to my senses.” And for giving him at least one pleasant memory of this place.

Jonathan picked his bag off the floor and put it back over his head. He hefted the gasoline tank and uncurled the nozzle.

“We have wasted enough time.”

Edward straightened his hat.

Jonathan poured gasoline on the mattress and the ground moving backwards back towards the steps. He grabbed the lit lamp on the way out.

At the top of the steps Jonathan tossed the empty tank aside and threw the lamp down the steps. The gasoline caught fire but it was not enough.

“If you would, Nigma.”

Edward held his cane out and a spark shot out towards the flame. And the lamp exploded in an inferno.

“Come, Nigma.” Jonathan turned his back to the fire and started to walk out. “We have a Reunion to make.”

 

* * *

 

“It’s ironic. I would not have been allowed to bring you as my date when I actually went here.”

Jonathan tore off his sticker name tag and crumpling it into a wad dropped it on the floor.

“So what’s the plan?” Ed stuck his name tag to his chest and smoothed it down. Mister E, it read.

“We’re spiking the punch bowl.” Jonathan revealed a vial of his special fear toxin.

“A classic.” Edward shrugged. “But frankly I expected something more from the god of fear and all.”

“I made a special concoction. It reacts in contact with alcohol and turns the liquid gaseous.” Jonathan smiled. “I trust you brought your nose plugs like I instructed.”

“That’s more like it.” Edward grinned and held out the special nose plugs. “Never go on a job with you without them.” He put them in.

Jonathan nodded. He could not even be insulted. His own was already in place.

Edward blocked him from view while he dumped the vial into the punch bowl. He put the empty vial into his pocket. Now the only thing to do was wait.

“Well. Well. Well. Look at who they let in.” Someone hit Jonathan on the back. “Spooky Crane.”

He turned around. “Brad Johnson.” His former tormentor was fat and bald now. But he would recognize that voice anywhere.

“And this must be your date.” Brad laughed. “How much is Spooks paying you to be his escort tonight?” He looked Edward up and down. “Whatever it is it clearly isn’t enough.”

Jonathan bristled. It was one thing to pick on him. But to insinuate that Edward was an escort was going too far.

“I’m not an escort, buddy.” Edward leaned into Brad’s face. “I’m a gigolo. And Jonny here is my sugar daddy. Not that I would expect you to know the difference.” He winked.

“I love this song.” Edward dragged Jonathan away. “Dance with me.”

Jonathan allowed Edward to lead. Edward looked over Jonathan’s shoulder.

“He’s still looking. Do you mind if I kiss you?” Edward asked.

They had not spoken of what happened back at the farm house. But the kiss had been in the back of his mind since it happened.

It didn’t help his crush any that it had been the best kiss of his life so far. Not that there had been many to compare it to.

“I don’t mind. But try not get us kicked out for indecency.”

Edward chuckled. And softly kissed him. He kept his mouth closed but it still stole Jonathan’s breath.

Nigma broke away. “Our friend is pouring something into the punch bowl.” He smiled. “The fun is about to begin.”

Jonathan grabbed Edward and kissed him again. And they were still kissing when the first screams started.

 

* * *

 

Jonathan licked his way down Edward’s naked chest. His tongue traced the outline of the question mark carved into the skin. He blew on the starburst scar at the end.

“What if Aunt Polly comes home?” Edward asked. He lay on Jonathan’s bed beneath him.

“Her note said she went to bingo. She won’t be back til morning.”

“How long can an old woman play bingo for?”

“She’s not actually playing bingo. It’s code for she’s spending the night at her boyfriend’s.” Jonathan tugged off Edward’s briefs. “She’s probably giving us time alone.”

Jonathan reached for the supplies Edward had had the foresight to bring on the trip. He squeezed out a healthy glob of lubricant and rubbed his hands together to warm it up before applying it to Edward.

Edward draped his leg over Jonathan’s shoulder and lifted up as Jonathan started to stretch him.

“What does this mean?”

“I think it means we’re about to fuck, Nigma.”

“I meant about us.”

“I can’t believe you want to have the what are we conversation while my fingers are up your ass.”

“Anyone ever tell you have a crude bedside manner, Dr. Crane?” Edward chuckled.

“Don’t have to mean anything. We’re not in Gotham.”

“What if I want it to mean something?”

“What about Penguin?”

“What about him?”

“I’m not judging. You two obviously have an open relationship but I don’t care to get in the middle of a war with the Penguin over you Edward.”

“Penguin and I are not in a relationship. Open or otherwise.”

“You’re wearing his ring, Nigma.”

“This?” Edward took off the the ring and held it up to Jonathan. “I performed a business service for the Penguin and he owes me a favor. I wear it because I like to remind him that he owes me.”

“So you and Penguin have never been in a sexual relationship?” Jonathan asked doubtfully.

“I didn’t say that. But it’s in the past.” Edward put the ring back on his finger. “I have a past. You know that. But I want you in my future.”

“That line work for ya often?” Jonathan added another finger and scissored them together.

“It’s not a line. Okay it is. But I mean it.”

Jonathan chuckled. “I’ll drive you away.”

“And I’ll drive you crazy. Don’t mean we can’t have a little bit of fun on the ride.”

Edward took the unopened condom from the table and ripped it open with his teeth. And rolled it onto Jonathan.

“Anyone ever tell you ya talk too much, Eddie?”

“Guess you’ll just have to find a way to shut me up then, Dr. Crane.” 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading.
> 
> If you like please leave a comment.


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